We are all familiar with mirrors. Mirrors are a part of our everyday life. We use mirrors for all sorts of reasons and so they come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. We use mirrors to see what’s in front of us. We use mirrors to see what is behind us. We use mirrors when we drive, when we dress, when we groom and for a few other applications. However, the basic function of the mirror is always the same. To see what we can’t see.
So, what is a mirror? Not going into a formal physics lesson of how a mirror works, the basic function of a mirror is a reflective light. You cannot see your reflection in a room void of light. It reflects an image as it is. It does not vary the reflection, nor does it manipulate the reflection. Mirrors reflect what we can see and what we can’t see. – we can’t see our own eyes without a mirror. Mirrors give us objective feedback and using this feedback we can make decisions and take actions that we otherwise could not necessarily do. Try put make-up on or comb your hair without a mirror. Mirrors aid our decision making and direct our actions.
When you don’t like what you see in the mirror, you don’t blame the mirror. The mirror does not distort the information it reflects. Our minds may distort the information it sees in the reflection or interpret the incoming information negatively, but we never blame the mirror, curse the mirror, or destroy the mirror because of how we process the information from the mirror.
Why am I talking about mirrors in a blog post about relationships. well, I work with the presupposition that marriage is the path to heaven. By heaven, in this context, I mean love, compassion, empathy, wholeness, authenticity and joy. Marriage enables us to develop and refine our heart skills, our strengths, and our potential.
Your partner becomes your mirror. They reflect back to you all your weaknesses, your projections, your areas for growth and development. They reflect blind spots and areas for growth that you cannot see. They reflect back as you are.
you could take the information, see your blind spots and areas of development, and create strategies and plans to grow and expand. This is why workshops, seminars, books, course, counselling, and coaching are imperative for the development of a healthy and expanding relationship with your partner. This is when we move towards each other and develop love, attachment, and intimacy.
There is no quick fix. There is no relationship without challenge, growth, and development. There is no easy ride. Changing who we are takes time, effort, consistency, and there are always new levels and different areas for growth. This is why couples love each other more the longer they are together.
What if your spouse was your saviour, your guru, your angel to enlightenment and happiness? I believe your spouse is your souls guide to your happily ever after, your souls’ mate. If your partner is your souls’ mate, how would you interact with them then? What could you do differently now?
When you can look at your relationship objectively as a third party, with out judgement, blame or fear. When you look at your relationship with love and with purpose, you will see a totally different picture. When you see a different picture, you start doing things differently and then the magic can start to happen.
I wish for you magic, love, connection and intimacy.
Brandon